Enjoy Your Relationships To The Full!

Although it may seem an extremely obvious thing to say, it might be something that you haven’t actually thought about: the quality of a sexual relationship (as measured by the number of orgasms and the frequency of intercourse) is a direct determinant of the satisfaction that two people feel with that relationship.

So far, so good. That might not be such a surprising conclusion: the research gets more interesting in the discovery that people who have a sexual relationship which is deeply satisfying – as measured by the criteria mentioned above – also have a good relationship in all other areas of their life; one that is far more satisfying than if they do not have a good sex relationship.

And the reason for this appears to be that a good sexual relationship produces feelings of intimacy and connection which spill over into the relationship in general.

And when a couple of partners are engaged with each other in a relationship that’s intimate and provides a sense of connection, clearly they are much more likely to be working harmoniously together to achieve objectives, they are much more likely to be getting along without arguments, and they are much more likely to be regarding each other with affection.

So what’s the message for us all here? Well I think it’s very obvious:  if your sexual relationship isn’t working particularly well, you need to find ways to improve it. The most obvious way most sexual relationships between most couples in this country could be improved is to increase the frequency of female orgasm.

Regrettably it has become all too common for sexual relationships to serve as a vehicle for the man’s sexual satisfaction whilst the woman remains unsatisfied – for which you can read, she has no orgasms, or at least she doesn’t orgasm on a regular basis.

Now why this should be is an interesting question, but probably relates in the main to men’s attitude to sex and women’s desire to please (or not upset) their man by being too sexually demanding.

It’s also possible there is a reflection of a hierarchical or at least patriarchal society in this dynamic, because men have controlled women’s sexuality in the Western world (and even more so elsewhere) for a very long time.

But we are moving into a new era of enlightenment and education, and in such a  period of time it’s appropriate we make efforts to ensure that sexual satisfaction is shared equally between the couples.

So this means there needs to be some way of ensuring  women reach orgasm on a regular basis, and by doing so, can share in sexual satisfaction and the greater relationship, it’s been demonstrated to come from this level of orgasmic satisfaction and pleasure.

One of the websites I found on the Internet which appears to be aimed solely at getting women into a place of greater sexual pleasure, i.e. greater orgasmic frequency, is www.womencomingwithjoy.com which reviews not only the history of orgasmic relationships between men and women, but also thoroughly debates and discusses the way in which women can come to orgasm on a much more regular basis, achieving sexual pleasure they might not otherwise experience.

Now you may think there are only a few ways to bring woman to orgasm – and of course in one sense you’d be correct: there is clitoral stimulation, vaginal stimulation, and, for the experts, G spot and cervical stimulation.

But that’s not the point I’m getting at! What I’m getting at is that there are numerous ways in which the erogenous zones responsible female orgasm can be stimulated by man to give a woman great pleasure. The least successful of these, as you may know, is intercourse.

Very few women reach orgasm during intercourse, and it appears that there are several reasons for this.

The first is that in general most women come through clitoral stimulation, and the clitoris receives very little stimulation during intercourse unless the couple take the time and trouble to use the coital alignment technique, which is specifically designed to provide clitoral stimulation.

The next problem is that men (in general) ejaculate so quickly that they aren’t able to provide enough stimulation to their woman, so that even if she could reach an orgasm during intercourse with prolonged lovemaking, she doesn’t do so.

It’s a controversial subject even now whether women have clitoral orgasms and virginal orgasms, but leaving that issue aside, it’s fair to say that most men’s quick ejaculation brings intercourse to an end long before a woman could have a chance of reaching orgasm even if she was able to.

And thirdly, sex is very much determined by the duration of the man’s arousal before he ejaculates. In other words, sex between heterosexual couples generally comes to an end when the man ejaculates, because as you almost certainly know, most men lose interest in sex after they have ejaculated.

And the difference between men and women in terms of sexual arousal and satisfaction is considerable: a lot of women who reach orgasm through clitoral stimulation will then want vaginal penetration.

The clear message of this is that if a woman is brought to orgasm by her man before he climaxes (however that is achieved), it’s much more likely to be a successful relationship than if he engages in intercourse, ejaculates, and then sex finishes with the woman unfulfilled and unsatisfied.

But all of this knowledge is useless unless you take it into a realm of techniques that can actually work for you as a couple, to obtain satisfactory sex – or even more than “satisfactory” – let’s aim for orgasmic bliss!

The website to which I’m directing you is all about sexual pleasure, and while it might not be a complete account of how to bring a woman to orgasm, or how to make a woman come if you prefer, it’s certainly a big step in the right direction.

It covers many of the aspects of sexuality which men and women don’t really know so much about – even if they’ve been in a relationship for some time.

Of course, another question is why men and women don’t discuss sex on a regular and intimate basis, but that’s another issue! What we can say with great confidence is this: when sex is going well, and providing a couple with satisfaction and pleasure, they’re much more likely to be able to talk about personally intimate issues, and as a result more likely to resolve any difficulties than they otherwise would be….

An Exciting New Website on The Law Of Attraction

You see the fact of the matter is that the law of attraction is a natural human skill which takes us from our everyday existence into the spiritual realm.

Of course people talk about the spiritual realm as something that you must have faith in – and yet belief in a higher power, what people call God, is indeed an act of faith, but once you’ve experienced manifestation it becomes much easier to believe that we are all a particular manifestation of the divine than it is without such experience!

The point being that manifestation reflects an absolute reality of human existence: and that reality is our capacity to contact, to connect with, a part of the universe that is “higher than” (or “outside”) ourselves, a part of the universe that has all possibilities wrapped up in, it waiting to unfold in the real world, according to our desires…..

Now this may be hard for people to believe if they have not experienced it, but of course that is indeed the act of faith to which I’ve referred already.

To prepare yourself for manifestation, you may need to be in a spiritual dimension – that is to say, you may need to feel you are connected to the universe as a part of a greater whole; you may need to feel the connection of yourself to the universal intelligence.

On the other hand, as Wallace Wattles said some years ago, you could just follow a set of simple instructions which allow manifestation to take place, although that is in itself an act of faith just as powerful, although perhaps ultimately more simple.

People ask why it is the universe allows manifestation to take place without sincere spiritual connection and / or belief. I think the answer is that the universe is not particular about conditions: it operates in accordance with a set of laws, and, like all closed systems that operate in accordance with a set of laws, if you know what you’re doing, and you have the right “instruction manual”, then you can manifest anything you want.

It’s probably disappointing to people who have a profound spiritual belief system to hear this, but it is correct! You don’t need to be a devotee of a spiritual guru or have a belief in God to be able to manifest anything you desire!

Which brings neatly us back to the point I made earlier – that is to say, an act of faith is simply an act of intention conducted in the knowledge and trust that there will be certain outcomes when certain inputs are applied.

A lot of people are interested in the way in which manifestation can operate by means of the law of attraction. But in my opinion comparatively few people can make creation work for them.

This is a really interesting question, and you have to ask why it should be that something which appears to be very fundamental to our nature should be so difficult to use in the real world.

So here’s a question…..

Ask yourself – do you seek to manifest the spiritual or the material?

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Nowhere is this question more relevant than when people are trying to manifest money.

The fact of the matter is that you could not choose an area of manifestation or law of attraction which is more fundamentally demonstrative of the way in which the law of attraction works than that of money abundance and prosperity.

You see, the most essential element of well-being and financial abundance is faith.

And we are not talking here about some kind of religious faith – we are  talking here about the faith, if you prefer to use the word you can substitute belief, that you must have before you can demonstrate the ability to manifest money. This is the kind of belief or faith that makes it possible to manifest  whatever it is you want.

Some people seem to have this innate quality almost as though they were born with it – whereas most of us will question the objectives that we set endlessly, doubting our faith, doubting our belief, and doubting our ability to achieve.

It’s a kind of spiritual aspect of our being. There’s no question that the experiences we have in childhood directly determine how rapidly and easily our faith and belief in a spiritual aspect of ourselves or a spiritual aspect of the universe begin to develop.

You can try this out for yourself by employing the law of attraction in your daily life – it is something that is a natural human gift, something with you all the time, and certainly something which you should be employing if you want to make life easy for yourself.

Why Not Use The Law of Attraction to Make Life Better for Yourself?


Children are curious about everything, but they are particularly curious about where they came from, and in the childish way that they have, will repeatedly ask questions of their parents about the nature of their connection to the universe; some children are precocious or perhaps naturally gifted in this area feel their connection to spirit right from day one.

But for most of us developing the spirituality necessary to encompass successful manifestation or to use the law of attraction with aplomb requires a spiritual practice, and an evolution of consciousness as we move through life.

Are you manifesting spirituality or materialism?

Are you manifesting spirituality or materialism?

In this framework – a spiritual framework belief about yourself and the world – it’s possible to see everything that happens to you as a spiritual gift. You are battling an adversary? Ask yourself what have they got to teach you. You’re battling the memory of how your parents treated you as a child? Ask yourself what you can learn from these lessons. Ask yourself how you can attract your desires so that you benefit spiritually!

This is the way to a state of grace, to a state of enlightenment, to a state of being that goes beyond the everyday world – it is, in fact, a state of evolved consciousness.

And this, apparently, can be the state of consciousness which is required to manifest successfully.

This is the state of consciousness which causes miracles to occur – or, as we prefer to know them, coincidences or synchronicity.

Make no mistake about it: for those who have a spiritual framework, the law of attraction is ineffable.

So spiritual work can come in many forms – shadow work, recovery work, 12-step work, meditation, visualization, initiation, vision quests… You name it the pathways to spiritual development are many and varied.

But Deborah L Price, author of Money Magic, suggests that forgiveness is the most important step we can take on the path towards fulfillment.

She says that unhealed wounds, resentment and blame, are obstacles that block the flow of good into our lives. And of course she’s not saying that in forgiveness you should be a victim or be walked over by those who’ve assaulted you in some way – psychically, physically or emotionally.

What she’s saying is that you need to be able to forgive the person, and to let go of the resentments that you feel, because although whatever happened is complete, your attachment to it lingers on in the shape of your emotional feelings.

Prayer is the most powerful spiritual tool available to us – or so Deborah says. Others might disagree with that, perhaps seeing deep psychotherapy a spiritual practice, for example.

But in any event the point is this: if you hope to use the law of attraction successfully, you need to be in a place of consciousness that goes beyond the place that most people reside.

You need to be able to see the bigger picture, to be able to ask the universe for guidance, and of course, more than anything else, you need to be able to connect with the universe in the way that facilitates the process of manifestation.

Deborah tells the story of how one of her friends came to visit her and asked for guidance – he couldn’t handle the work that he had been trained for, and he felt he hadn’t got any other skills. He was in panic, state of intense fear about what he was going to do. All he could say was “I need cash, I need cash.”

But what he really wanted was to be with his mother who was old and needed his support – she lived in Europe, he lived in America . And so Deborah told him to follow his heart, because if that was what he needed to do, he should go to her.

But the point was this: waiting for money to show up before he took the path would be a false mistake, a diversion from where he needed to go and what he needed to do.

That is, though, the way most of us operate. We wait for money first, believing that it will open a route to what we want to do and want to achieve.

But it seems that actually the other way round is the right way. That we set off on our journey first, and we take faith and belief with us! And then, having taken faith with us, faith that the money would appear, our problems are usually, perhaps mysteriously, solved.

The point of this anecdote is that connecting to spirit is the pathway to success – being cut off from the source of your own spirituality can only lead to a sense of powerlessness, and failure.

Yet the belief that money will give you the power you need to succeed is false: only by cultivating the spiritual power within yourself to connect with spirit, or if you prefer, connect to the universe, can you do anything.

For the universal field is the source of all creativity, and it is the universal field – which has been called things like the cosmic consciousness, or the divine intelligence, or the great mystery – which is responsible for providing everything that you need.

Indeed, the universal field is a place in which all things are possible, and where all manifestation of reality begins… This is the way the universal law of attraction works, and it’s an inescapable law which none of us can avoid if we seek to manifest our lives and create our reality.

In our materialistic world, of course, we spend a lot more time and energy trying to acquire physical goods and money than we do trying to develop our own spirituality.

It could well be, in fact it almost certainly is, that the disillusionment and cynicism which is so widespread these days is a reflection of the fact that most people are more or less cut off from the source, from the spirit, from the universe.

So should you wish to try manifest using the Law of Attraction, the moral of this is to use all of the tools at your disposal to develop your spirituality.

Law of Attraction

The Law of Attraction says that you draw into your life whatever you think about, that your predominant ideas will certainly find a way to materialize. Yet the Law of Attraction triggers some tough questions that don’t seem to have yet found any good responses.

I would say, however, that these issues typically aren’t due to any issues with the Law of Attraction itself but rather they originate in the thinking we have around the nature of objective truth.

Some common questions:

  • What happens when people put out conflicting intents, like 2 people intending to get the same job when just one position is available?
  • Do children, infants, and/or pets put out purposes?
  • If a kid is abused, does that mean the child intended it in some way?
  • If I plan for my relationship to improve, but my spouse does not seem to care, exactly what will take place?

These concerns seem to damage the reliability of the Law of Attraction. Occasionally folks address them by going quite freaky….. for example, it’s been claimed that a kid experiences misuse because s/he is paying off karma from a previous life.

Well, sure … we could discuss just about anything if we bring previous lives into the formula, but what a cop-out. On the other hand, unbiased facts about the Law of Attraction are in short supply as well, and satisfactory responses to our questions are rarely forthcoming from the “gurus”….

I have actually never been satisfied by others’ solution to these inquiries, and they’re pretty essential questions if the Law of Attraction and manifestation is to be believed. (Click here for an idea about this.)

Some publications hint at the solution yet never really explain it (like Napoleon Hill‘s, for example). That could be due to the principle of subjective fact. Subjective fact is a belief system where (1) there is just one awareness, (2) you are that particular consciousness, and also (3) everything and everybody in your reality is a projection of your ideas.

Subjective reality nicely answers all these challenging Law of Attraction inquiries. Let me enlighten you… this is hard to follow, but stick with it!

In subjective reality there’s just one consciousness, and it’s all yours. Subsequently, there’s only one source of intentions in your universe or cosmos– YOU.

While you could come up with many ideas, they all already exist inside your awareness. You know this is how your mind functions, but you haven’t yet understood what thoughts are waiting in potential energy form. These are a sort of desire. When you consciously think of them, when you intend them to come into reality, they do.

Considering that none of the various other thoughts you have waiting to manifest are in any way separate from you, nobody else can have them. Therefore, the only goals you can manifest are yours. You’re the only thinker in this universe of yours!

It’s important to correctly identify the YOU in this idea of subjective truth. YOU are not your body – the egotistic you is a physical body existing in a world filled with unconscious thoughts. You’re the single point of awareness where this entire truth manifests.

Suppose you’re having a dream. Are YOU the body you identify with? No, obviously not —  that’s merely your dream form. YOU are the dreamer. The whole dream happens within your consciousness. All desires are projections of your subconscious thoughts, and, as a matter of fact, in a lucid dream, you can do anything you think you can.

This is a denser cosmos than you experience in your thoughts, so manifestation occurs more slowly on the physical plane – but you are still the cause of all the effects in your life.

The suggestion that woman and men have a spiritual purpose is an illusion. Right here’s just one issue: how the Law of Attraction governs our lives.

So what happens when people put out clashing purposes, like two people (one of whom is you!) who want the same job?

Given that you’re the one who controls your destiny, this is a completely internal dispute — and it’s only happening within YOU. You are holding the thought that both of you desire the same position. Big mistake!

And you’re additionally thinking (creating reality) that only one job exists, and only one person can obtain it. So you’re creating competition. This entire circumstance is your creation.

Why? You know no better, perhaps. Or maybe you rely on competitors, to make sure that’s exactly when you show up at your best. Perhaps you have some beliefs or subtle intentions about who gets the job – in which case your expectations will show up.

Another idea: maybe you have a higher order belief that life is arbitrary, unreasonable, or unjust and uncertain, so you manifest an outcome to prove your beliefs are true.

Being the only manifester in your reality puts a substantial obligation on your shoulders.

You can surrender control of your life by assuming randomness and unpredictability rule, yet you can never avoid responsibility. You’re the single manifester in your universe.

If you focus on war, hardship, disease, and deprivation, that’s exactly what you’ll manifest.

If you consider peace, love, and delight, you’ll materialize that too. Your reality will always become exactly what you assume it is. Whenever you consider anything, you summon its expression.

Your consciousness is the only aspect of you which has intentions, so what takes priority is just what YOU want. And every thought is an intention, so however you think of the other living beings in your reality is what you’ll ultimately manifest for them.


Video – Manifesting reality

Bear in mind that ideas are ordered, so if you have a high order idea that reality is arbitrary as well as unforeseeable and also beyond your command, then that idea will certainly manifest.

It’s your whole collection of thoughts that determines just how your reality materializes.

Suppose you’re planning one intention for you and one for your spouse? The actual unified intention is all about dispute. For this reason, what you get, based on the impact of your highest beliefs, will be to experience dispute with your spouse. If your thoughts are conflicted, your truth will be too.

This is why assuming responsibility for your life is so vital. If you want to experience peace in the world, then think only of peace in your world.

If you want to view abundance on the planet, think only of abundance.

If you would like to delight in a great sexual relationship, then expect loving partnerships for everyone.

If you intend things simply for yourself, you’re planning conflict and separation; subsequently, that’s exactly what you’ll experience.

In practice it’s not possible to de-create what you’ve already manifested. And you’ll continue creating the very same troubles simply by thinking about them. However when you assume total responsibility for everything you’re experiencing in your world right now — absolutely every little thing — then you have the power to change reality by realigning your thoughts.

Your world is all your production. Feel grateful for your power, for the grandeur of your world. And after that begin producing the truth you really, genuinely want!

Hold the right intentions, goals and objectives. Think about what you desire most; stop thinking about what you don’t want.

One of the most convenient methods to do this is to pay attention to your feelings. Thinking about your desires really feels empowering, while thinking about what you do not want makes you really feel negative.

Therefore, if you feel negative, you may be thinking of what you do not desire. Transfer your thought processes back towards what you do actually want, and your mood will become more positive quickly. Do this habitually and you’ll start to view your reality in a new way, to start with in subtle ways, but later in bigger and more meaningful ways….